May 11
13
I’m a real cook
By real, I mean – I really suck. I really get it wrong. I really need cooking lessons. Or perhaps, I really need a live-in chef.
You see… today I don’t have a recipe for you. I don’t even have one for me (what ever that means).
Last week when I did my grocery shopping, I purposely bought ingredients I don’t normally use in day to day cooking. To try and stretch and force myself to think/look outside the box.
Some I’ve used… the rest are still sitting in my crisper. Things like a leek, a perfectly good onion related vegetable… but nevertheless, still unused. How about 2 beetroots…?? Like HELLO, what was I thinking?! Have I told you that a couple of months ago that our oven stopped working? That we’d saved for a super fancy one and now waiting for it to be installed??
Well, back to all things beetroot, THIS loser didn’t think that any recipe that include beets and is worth cooking, needs an oven. Clever. Anyone want two beetroots?
Pomegranate anyone? It sounded good at the time, but on inspection it basically makes good juice and sauces…. Meh. I’ll probably get around to that, just not right now.
But then I get to my ultimate disaster and also nomination for husband of the year award. Wanting to be creative and cook something yum for my parents (who are up from Melbourne for the week), I decided to give Vietnamese a crack.
HA!
Who was I fooling?
For them, I decided to give fried rice paper rolls a go, and for Joe – well he was getting the filling and a salad. Waaaaay too many carbs in rice paper. But my mum is on a strict no wheat, no yeast, no sugar, no life nutritional plan and thought this just might jazz things up.
Don’t get me wrong, the flavours were pretty alright – however after many split, ruined and well, pathetic attempts at trying to fry my rolls. I cracked it and made an executive decision to cut my losses and just serve them the filling on rice because otherwise we were all going hungry. Rolls were emptied. Prep time be damned, and moved on.
See, everything seems ok doesn’t it? Mum and dad enjoyed it, the plates were empty – what more could you ask for? Later that night Joe seemed quiet, down and avoiding eye contact. I should’ve twigged but being the clueless person that I am kept badgering him.
“What’s wrong?”
“Are you tired?”
“Are you sure nothing is wrong?”
Eventually I got it out of him.
Despite eating all his dinner… he HATED it! He was still hungry and there wasn’t really anything left for him to eat. Wow – guess who felt chipper for the rest of the evening?! The poor guy didn’t want to hurt my feelings and while that’s all noble and stuff (here is why he’s nominated for husband of the year award), I pointed out he really should speak up in future, because I probably would’ve made it again.
“Don’t do that!!” was the alarmed response.
So, now – not only do I have a limited repertoire, I also now have lost my mojo. It’s gone… vanished and vamoosed.
On the upside… I did make a ruby red grapefruit salad that was pretty ok.
But that’s not rocket science is it?
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